Sorry about yesterday's lack of posting on my part, had a dentist appointment which took WAY too long. That's surprising though, my dentist is Asian, pretty sure that counts as dishonoring his famiry. But anyways, I'm going to post a daily Cyanide and Happiness comic because they're just plain awesome. Here's today's:
This comic really speaks to me... As a child we all had to go through punishments, but I'm glad our parents never had intercourse with us, unless your name is Ian, then, you deserve it (probably only Dorkpool will get the reference). Also, as we grow up and get older and start to build families, remember: sex is for your wife, not your children.
One of my favorite quotes ever comes from a video game character who is without a doubt the wisest person I've ever met without meeting. His name is Cave Johnson, and one time he said:
One of my favorite quotes ever comes from a video game character who is without a doubt the wisest person I've ever met without meeting. His name is Cave Johnson, and one time he said:
"Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!"
This solves practically any problem ever, simply. all you have to do, is replace life's manager with whoever is giving you trouble. The police can't take a burnt lemon in for evidence, the fingerprints and DNA would burn off. One last thing before I go, Dorkpool and I were texting this morning, and this is what went down...
Sotaar- Do you believe in ManBearPig?
Dorkpool- I believe he watches over us all. Do you believe in the Illuminati?
Sotaar- I know they're real, but their morals are messed up...
Dprkpool- It's a conspiracy!
Sotaar- It's a crazed society of fancy people with top hats who support the devil, and are funded by Disney!
Dorkpool- Disney! It's always about Disney! And they bought Star Wars and Marvel so they can give the Illuminati more money!
Sotaar- And it's probably only a matter of time before they posses one of-
Dorkpool- One of what? Dude. Dude. THERE'S NO WAY YOU COULDN'T HAVE FINISHED THAT TEXT! (I have OCD by the way)
Sotaar- Our eyes once were blinded...
Dorkpool- Is that you or the Illuminati talking?
Sotaar- Now through him do we see...
Dorkpool- KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! (For sake of time and space I shortened his screaming of Khan's name)
Sotaar- That they have forgotten...
And when the world shall listen...
And when the world shall see...
And when the world remembers...
That world shall cease to be...
Dorkpool- All hail ManBearPig
Now, Dorkpool may have said it before, but as a child I wasn't dropped, I was probably pegged like a football right at a wall. You might think that'd kill someone, but you obviously have never met me.
~Sotaar~
~Sotaar~